Roni, a friend of mine and soon to be grandmother, called me and asked me to give her daughter a blessing at her baby shower. While the party was mostly a time to “shower” the soon to be arrival with gifts, Roni wanted this occasion to be different. She wanted her daughter, Victoria, to experience the community of women she had experienced and to let Victoria know that anytime she needed it, these same women would be there for her, through thick and thin. This was important to Roni because Victoria was a single mother, and she wanted her to know she was not alone in raising this baby.
As I discerned the information, I knew that not any blessing would do, this moment was a “rite of passage,” and it deserved a momentous occasion marking a significant milestone in her daughter’s life, moving from young woman to mother.
Quickly, I began to research different rituals and found one I could alter to make it fit this situation. I asked Roni to bring me a scarf she enjoyed but would be okay in passing it onward. Roni picked a pink one (her favorite color) and sparkly, a special fun characteristic of Roni that Victoria loved.
Here’s how I created the ritual:
Setup: I created an altar that had had all the symbols related to both mom and baby for their birth months, the flowers and gemstones. Also placed on the altar were the four elements, sacred symbols that are all around us and within us: salt for the earth, a red candle for fire, a small bowl of water, palo alto for air.
The baby shower started with Victoria receiving a henna tattoo of a giraffe on her belly so that she would have something to focus on during labor. Brilliant idea!
Next, I thought it would be good for Roni to anoint Victoria into motherhood, using the oils of “calm” and “serenity” and giving her a blessing including sharing the wisdom from one mom to another. It was beautiful to witness because also in this blessing, she let her daughter know how strong she was and what great skills she had which would suit her in this role of motherhood. Watching as the two of them connected with eyes and heart, the love between mother and daughter was astounding, and the whole room felt it.
Then I gave Victoria the bowl of water from the altar to speak into it all the worries and the fears she had as a mother from being worried about not being good enough, to being worried about how tired she would be and all the things in between. And when she was complete, she poured those worries into a plant and blessed them. The plant would transmute the negative energies into something that would grow and flourish.
Lastly, we took the pink sparkly scarf and had each woman in the room speak into it their own mom wisdom learned from life’s lessons and blessing Victoria and the baby as well. There was not a dry eye in the house as clearly each woman imparted such great wisdom, and they all felt the love in the room.
I watched as mom and daughter released worries and concerns and connect at a much deeper level. Something very magical transpired here. That is the beauty of ritual, to witness the power of the present moment and mark time and place and memory.
Rituals help us give reverence to special moments, occasions, and rites of passage in our lives. These conscious acts built from intention, energy and commitment, bring more meaning to our lives and to our families. They have such a positive impact on us, and we remember them for a lifetime.
For me, rituals are like the mile markers on our life timeline indicating a special time that is important to remember. And when things get tough our journey, as they often do, these special memories (mile markers) get us through the tough times.
For more information on rituals or to have Marie help you create yours, contact Marie@MariesGold.com. We look forward to being alongside you as a companion on this journey of life.